Shh!

It is Tom Waits time! Shh, close all the curtains - shut off the televisions, find me some wine and let us all be quiet! Tom Waits is sublime and I want to sit in emptiness and let my whole soul immerse itself in all his glory.

Nothing fits into anything. My thoughts are always dancing around each other awkwardly. They bump and startle one another. They don't get along and they make the oddest of faces. They tire me. Oh, so much tires me. I want to close my eyes and stay shut away from everything for at least a good while. What is the use of anything? Christmas is on Friday. Six months since...since it all happened. I am angry. But I am mostly just sad. That's laughable. Sad!? I am not sad. I am completely and utterly torn apart. My heart is in splinters! I have cried an ocean of tears every day since. So - really..honestly...what the fuck is there to say?? Let it rain flowers now...let something beautiful fall down upon this all.
Sorry if I am a trifle incoherent.